Going in Circles

The past few days have been a bit of a downward turn from the trajectory that I’d been on. I’ve started to be a bit of a hermit and although I’ve been burning the candle at both ends when it comes to my client work, my personal affairs are a bit chaotic. About a week or two ago I literally spent 8 hours balancing our checkbook. With so many accounts (a lot of debt and making sure that all the balls stay in the air) it can take a lot of time if you’ve managed to neglect them for an extended period of time. Since then I’ve been good about keeping it reconciled. However, what I have neglected to do is what we all fall victim to, taking care of ourselves.

I’ve been in a little personal slump. I know that it’s temporary because I now have systems in place so that I can’t stay in that place for very long. Every day can’t be great and I’m okay with that. I love that my darker days are less and less and that I have enough in my life to keep me very occupied. Sure, I have days where I wish I could completely tune out the world and there are some times when I can achieve that, but right now I’m just learning how to adapt in a constructive way. There’ll never be enough hours in the day but there’s always tomorrow.

For the first time since first filing taxes in the late 90s, I’ve not yet filed mine for 2015. Sure, I have the data and most of it are where it’s supposed to be but for the past 3 or so months, I’ve just not been as diligent as I usually am about my very meticulous records. I even bought a NeatDesk and outside of setting it up and testing it out, I’ve done nothing else. Correction, I do dust it. Sure, I have all my receipts neatly and chronologically filed but that’s not the point, I’m supposed to be going paperless. Now, it just means I’ll have to spend more concentrated time working on getting them digitized. Sigh. I’m my own worst enemy.

Next up, my quarterly taxes and student loan. I didn’t pay my estimated quarterly taxes for the last quarter of last year and this year’s, well, I’d planned on saving it for this first quarter and that didn’t happen. So, I have what I can assume will be a big tax debt owed. Hmm, note to self, consider a GoFundMe page. Just kidding. I miss having my taxes automatically deducted. I wish there was a way to do that when you’re self-employed. Well, there is, it’s called discipline. I’m currently lacking that and I feel sure that I’m about to be hit with a wake-up call, a sizeable bill for the IRS. As for my student loan, I’d gone through 2 lean years and so I didn’t have to pay on my student loans. Because of our income level, our loan payments were zero. However, I know that won’t be the case this year. The emails have already started showing that I need to submit my verification documents and that if I don’t I’m looking at student loan payments that are almost equal to our monthly rent payments. Ouch.

I was thinking, exercising is a bit of a double-edged sword. If you workout then you have more energy and are generally in a better mood. Whereas, if you fall off the wagon, which is what has presently happened, then it’s more like falling with a literal and figurative heavy thud. Your mood so easily switches back to being humdrum. Exercising is a high maintenance activity and it now being pollen season makes it even less appealing. I know, I’m making excuses. I can start going back to the gym which is free and a two-minute walk from our apartment. Excuses. Excuses. All I know is that despite my great accomplishment two weeks ago, climbing Stone Mountain for the first time, I’ve erased that progress. How? Chick-fil-A milkshakes. Several times per week. Enough said.

I am excited about taking the time to update my blog. I liked it the way it was but my original theme was updated by WordPress and I was delaying the switch. However, I figure I’d treat myself to rolling out a new look. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do. Well, I’m now off to bed. In less than 8 hours I’ll have to be at the dentist’s office getting two permanent crowns put in. Yep, yippee!

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