I’m in one of those moods. You know it, when you feel as though the glass is more than half empty. You look at the glass and it appears that there’s not enough liquid to quench anyone’s thirst. Maybe it’s the time of year, day, or week. Lately I’ve felt like such a loser. My wardrobe seems to have shrunken and so has my pocketbook.

My weight fluctuates dramatically throughout the year. It drives me crazy! I’m not one for rotating wardrobes and yet it seems as though I’ve forgotten about it when it comes to my wardrobe’s contents. Each morning I walk into my walk-in closet and consider which items fit my current frame. My mom has always emphasized the importance of covering one’s unmentionables, fat rolls. That’s increasingly harder to do since I purged most of my last ‘fat’ wardrobe. And with no money to buy any new items I must be creative. The thing is, I’m not even desirous of shopping. I think it has more to do with the lack of money.

The lack of money and the frustration in not knowing where to earn more will suck the love or desire out of anything. With a demanding full-time job and the stresses of finances I’m now reconsidering doing an administrative services venture. I’m not sure if I can or want to do it anymore.

I want scream, to cry, to disappear but I’m too tired for even that. I know I should just breathe, something that easy shouldn’t be so hard.